A Marriage Farmer

The Bible clearly says that we “reap what we sow”. We would probably all agree that this is true. What many of us don’t do very well is think through what we would like to reap in our marriage, and then plant (sow) accordingly.

Ask any farmer and he/she will tell you that there is a lot of planning that goes into growing a successful crop. The first decision to be made is what kind of crop to plant this year. Then, seed must be purchased, fields must be plowed up to get them ready and the proper weeding and fertilizing plans must be drawn up. Then, right when everything is going according to plan, nature van throw them a curveball in the form of too much rain, or not enough rain; gas prices increasing or crop prices decreasing. Farmers have to remain vigilant and committed to their goal – no matter what comes.

I have never met a farmer who couldn’t tell me what crop was planted in his field, or what gas or crop prices were. They most likely will be able to tell you the weekly forecast, and how much their county is above or below average rainfall for the year. They are deliberate about what they do…and the results are astonishing.

I have met, however. many a husband who has little idea what “crop” he is going to reap, or who has given any thought to a “planting” plan. It seems many of us simply “hope”, or “wish” or “pray about” our marriages yielding a fruitful harvest, but we don’t actually know how that is going to happen. Many sit around watching TV, or spend hours enjoying our favorite hobbies, and yet sincerely hope to reap a bountiful marriage “crop” one day. I hope you know by now that I am very pro-hobby, and watch too much TV myself, but I am growing very weary of counseling men who don’t exert any effort to become great husbands, but will go play golf, or go hunting at the drop of a hat. They invest hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars on things that will mean nothing when we stand face to face with Jesus.

Sorry for the rant –  What I am proposing to all of us is that we simply take time to focus on what really matters, and ask God to help us have the “want to”, and the courage to become more deliberate in our approach to marriage. A great marriage will not happen by itself. God gives us the job of initiating it, and seeing it through – and He takes our calling very seriously. So should we. One day He will ask to see the harvest.

If any of us are experiencing a lean marriage harvest this year – what do you say we put in a plan of action that will sow seeds that will reap an abundant harvest in the months/years ahead – and will make our Father very proud at the same time?

Share with the rest of us what “seeds” you plan to sow. We can all us the suggestions and the encouragement.

Sow bountifully,


Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

5 thoughts on “A Marriage Farmer

  1. Thank you for your thoughtful article. I would like to share that I have found that my wife needs assurance that I have been doing my part as a leader in our home. While I may have a great time in my devotions or prayer or meditation with my Father God, I have found that a commitment to Jacquie to bring something for her from my time of worship.has helped our relationship grow extremely strong this last year.. My most important communication to her is a confident loving smile and long assuring look into her eyes. From this one expression she knows that I have experienced freedom that can only come from intercession for her, our household and community. This can lead to a conversation about something that may have come to me through God’s word or some emphasis in prayer that may be important for both of us to pay attention to that day. These seeds might be called “leading in love”. The fruit from “leading in love” has been sweet.

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