Time to Pray?


There aren’t too many husbands who have this “pray with your wife” thing down pat. We all have good intentions. We all mean well. We all know it is vital to our relationship and for waging effective warfare against the enemy.

Then, why is it so dang hard to DO – on a regular basis?

Experience has taught me that two forces in my life are the primary culprits: satan and busyness

Satan hates marriage, and he knows that a couple who prays is 100x mightier than a couple who does not. He is actually fearful of such a couple. They are a formidable foe to him and his schemes. The Bible is very clear that “wherever two or more are gathered in His name, He is in the midst of them.”  It also tells us ” if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.”  Matthew 18:19 says – “if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven.”

Clearly, a husband and wife together wield a great sword in the battle for their marriage, children, mission, etc. This is a major target area for the enemy to attack on a regular basis. One of the main reasons we should strive to pray with our wife on a regular basis is to wield the authority we have been given by Christ over the enemy, and to bind him away from our marriage, children, job, finances, ministry, and life. If we” resist the devil, he WILL flee” – that is a promise… but we must resist.

Busyness is the curse of our generation. We try to balance a marriage, raising children, keeping our job, having a relationship with God, ministry desires, hobbies, friends, keeping fit, staying socially connected, in-laws, extended family, school, career goals, etc. etc. It can be exhausting. By the time the kids go to bed we are pooped. There is little left for each other. Our sex life suffers and more importantly, our spiritual intimacy with each other suffers as well.

What’s a guy to do?

Please send your comments and advice – but here are a couple from me:

1. Don’t let the enemy take you on a guilt trip because you don’t get to pray with your wife everyday. ( Don’t get complacent either) We have been deceived into thinking that we must pray every day with her or we are second-class husbands. While daily prayer is a fabulous goal, in reality we may not get to every day. Start out by making it a goal to spend one good, face-to-face prayer time with your wife every week. Make an appointment. Put it on the calendar. Don’t miss the appointment. You will find that this is so refreshing and satisfying on so many fronts that you will want to add another “date” specifically to pray. Your oneness will grow, and your spiritual lives will grow as you see God’s hand at work in the affairs of your lives. In time, you will find that the two of you are praying more often, and it is a vital, don’t -want- to- miss -it, time in your life.

2. Don’t miss the opportunities God brings your way every week to simply stop in the moment, grab your wife’s hand, and say a prayer. Maybe it’s as you are leaving for work. Maybe it’s on the way to church, school, or the doctor’s office. Your wife wants so badly to hear you pray. It is a tremendous source of connection for her. It let’s her “in” your heart and soul. Listen to God throughout the day and ask Him for spiritual sensitivity to hear Him when He says “stop – pray now”. These do not have to be long, well-thought out prayers. Just heartfelt thank you’s, blessings, prayers for protection, peace, comfort – whatever He leads you to pray. If we truly are keeping our wife as our top priority (1 Corinthians 7:33), and are desiring to love her “as Christ loves the church” (Ephesians 5:25) – we will be thinking about her and her needs throughout our days.

Start with one “appointment” a week. Work up from there. You DO have the time. Be deliberate!

Listen for opportunities to stop and pray short, “head-of-the-house” prayers for your wife.

What is working for you and your wife?